30 Day Challenge

I've lost something. They refer to it as "touch," though I don't know what it is that I'm supposed to be touching. Whatever it is, I can't write as Sophelia. Maybe it's because I am uninspired, but then again the alter ego is too damn cautious to throw herself into the hurricane of life. My life is not even a blank canvas -- (today, even an expanse of white can be interpreted into some schmaltzy commentary on our modern society). It's just a piece of nothingness, if that even makes sense.

I haven't given up on EP. Not at all. Rory, Charlotte, Rhys -- they are all well and alive in my mind. But whenever I cast out the line, fishing for the beautiful words that once came to me so naturally, the hook comes back with tattered cliches or nothing at all.

I return to school on Monday, but I'm going to impose a new challenge for myself. I found it while tumblr surfing and while I am undoubtedly going to pale in comparison to the girl genius who came up with the challenge, I figure it will be a good exercise for me to find whatever it is that I've lost and hopefully coax it back. I don't intend to finish in 30 days, but I have decided I am not going to post anything else until I finish the rounds. DISCIPLINE!

Here's how it works:

Heard of the 30 Day Song Challenge? The girl that I was tumblr-stalking (ha-ha) made it even more difficult. Using a random word generator to cycle through Very Common and Common nouns, adjectives, transitive verbs, and interjections, a word is assigned to each of the 30 days. She decided that for each day of June, she would post a song and at least 200 words of fictional prose based on that generated word. Well, I'm going to tweak it for my own purposes. I am not setting a deadline for myself, other than that I cannot post anything else other than these challenges until I finish. So here are my rules:

1. Each post will have the selected song embedded to the entry, whether via youtube or some other resource I find.
2. The prose that I write will not have a word count.
3. The writing must be inspired by the generated word for that entry.
4. A fragment (or more) of the lyrics must be used at some point in the entry, whether as an epigraph to the text or as part of the prose itself.
5. Regarding the song portion of the challenge, I may not use any songs that I have already previously written vignettes for on this blog. (Ex. "Yellow" by Coldplay, "Bloodstream" by Stateless, "Airplanes" by B.o.B., etc.)
6. The prose need not necessarily be fictional (since the existence of Sophelia blurs the line between fact and fiction anyway).
7. I must never allude to You in any of these posts.
   

THE LIST (to be hyperlinked as entries are made):

1. Classification
2. Implicit
3. Analyze
4. Fancy
5. Vast
6. Leather
7. Interior
8. Remark
9. Sorry
10. Lamp
11. Overnight
12. Miss
13. Goodness
14. Rationale
15. Libel
16. Invisible
17. Touch
18. Ratio
19. Cellular
20. Compliment
21. Whoops
22. Ancient
23. Coupled
24. Shell
25. Break
26. Recursion
27. Mock
28. Swap
29. Hell
30. Man
    

Let the games begin.

Space Bound

"I'm a space bound rocket ship and your heart's the moon
And I'm aiming right at you"

The only reason I thought of you recently is not because I wonder what you are doing anymore. You no longer pepper my daily thoughts, adding the artificial spice to a mundane life. No, the only reason you slipped into my consciousness like ghostly curls of smoke is that I still don't really know the answer. All I know is that eventually, your presence eroded away from me.

I regarded her obsession with Twilight with patient tolerance and mild amusement. I held my tongue. I used to be like her, you know. I believed that among the 7 billion people in this world, I was meant to find the one. When we had our debate that night, I couldn't help but feel I was arguing with my younger self.

"Nobody knows me I'm cold
Walk down this road all alone
It's no one's fault but my own
It's the path I've chosen to go
Frozen as snow I show no emotion whatsoever so"

I don't know when or why I became so cold. Perhaps my silence all those years chained to you had caused me to freeze.

"I burn in degrees Kelvin for you," I once wrote. Maybe I wasn't the star. I was the rocket ship, and your heart was the moon. My aim never wavered all those years, but it didn't matter. Once the flame sputtered out, I was trapped in the coldness of space. Somewhere between you and the girl I had once been.

-- "Space Bound" by Eminem